I have stepped away from books on Spirituality for a bit – looking for some topical information that wasn’t Pagan in nature. So, I picked up “Ghost Rider” by Rush drummer Neil Peart. In his book he details his journey throughout Canada and the United States shortly after the deaths of his wife and daughter. As I am reading through his tales of trips both solo and earlier in his life with friends, he keeps detailing trips with his friend Brutus. Its fairly easy to tell that Brutus is one of those friends that traverses the space between family and friends. And as I read some of these passages, it dawned on me — there is no “Brutus” currently in my life.

In fact, I have to go back past a decade to find that particular facet in my life. Oh, surely there are a few folks that will point that I have Pam in my life. And while its true that she fills a very distinct and important role in my life…she’s not in that role that “Brutus” has for Neil.

Charles is the last person that fulfilled that role for me. That was a time now long into the rear-view mirror of my past. He was that friend that was ALWAYS there. Every spare moment we had, we spent doing something….anything. We were nearly inseparable. We are almost the same in nature – always up for fun, always willing to be as goofy and off-the-wall as we could, and yet we were different. He was a new-wave punk – with his multi-colored hair. I was the heavy metal retread. Very different types of people. But we were always there for one another. If I had money, I bought the meals for us both. If he did, then he bought. A typical pair.

We had always remained in contact with one another. Our paths eventually grew apart when I joined the military. But we were always friendly to one another when we finally made contact with one another. And then one day, he made a disparaging comment about one of his state politicians, and I pointed out that the choice that the politician made was something that they could not have avoided because of certain state laws. And then suddenly, I was not to be within his circle…. and its remained to this day.

I will admit it was a hurtful moment. It was even more hurtful when I reached out to him again six months later – joking that surely enough time had passed that we should likely not be mad at one another. That was met with A single word response: no. And then my being blocked by him (this exchange was on Facebook). Which, in turn, has led me to wonder a bit about whether or post-high school friendship had more to do about the Honda Civic I was driving…

But I really cannot question that. I am not Charles, not am I inclined to understand what he believes and thinks at any given time. I can, however, cherish the memories of the happier times we had together as friends. It may not have been as intimate a friendship as I had placed on it…but it was a friendship nonetheless.

All of which brings me to today. Where I am now. And to be perfectly frank, I don’t have a close friendship like the one I thought I had with Charles. There are a few friendships that I have that could eventually led down that Path…but most of those individuals live quite a distance from me, so I have to cherish the times I do get to spend with them. Most folks refer to this close, somewhat local friend as their “partner in crime”. That individual that you can go hang out with for a party, or be just as likely to spend time with them discussing the deeper intricacies of life.

I have a few local adventures planned. In the near time – I am looking at visiting a nearby cemetery, where I have been told members of both the US Calvary and the First Nations tribes of the local area are said to be buried. There is also a second cemetery further down the road that is considered to be a ghost town, since the town no longer exists around the cemetery. Most likely, I will be visiting these places alone…along with the subsequent towns I will drive through. But its an experience I am looking forward to undertaking, even if it is alone.

Do I really need a “sidekick”?  An “hombre”? Sure.  Would love to have one along for some of the fun. Then again…perhaps I should get a dog.  Just a thought….